Surviving annihilation

Why is it..

That time and time again..

I sabotage myself.

…

Every

Single

Effort

That I make

To grant myself some worth..

Or to actually try to be me..

Is met with..

And counteracted to with..

An excruciating need to

Self sabotage

Self harm

Self loath

…

And finally..

Self destruct

Every single aspect of those attempts..

Every

Single

Part

..of.. me

…

It is tiring..

To the extreme..

To be an entity..

That is trying to survive..

And trying to annihilate itself..

At the very same time.

—

ᗪ𝒾∂เรᗪ𝔫ค©️MMXXI